Sunday, December 27, 2009

I'm Back - Top 10 "Things I Wish I had Blogged About"

Helllllo again readers, aka Mom, Dad… I know it’s been a while, but despite unemployment for the greater part of my absence, I managed to carry on a fairly busy life in limbo. With this said, I’ve decided it’s time to get back on track, and the best way I can think of to accomplish this is to reflect back on the past 3 months with a Top 10 List of “Things I Wish I had Blogged About.”

1. "Things I Will Miss About DC" Finale
You’re glad you missed this one. It would have inevitably been a long and drawn out sob sounding depiction of the great times I had in DC with my amazing friends. You know- the sappy, sentimental “my friends are better than yours” speech. Of course, my DC friends ARE awesome and I DO miss them terribly, but I have no doubt they would have even vomited uncontrollably after reading the blog entry that would have spewed their frenzied and bizarre praises for at least 3 paragraphs too long.

2. Move to Pittsburgh
What can I say…My actual physical move from DC to Pittsburgh wasn’t all that exciting. I took several pictures of my car hooked onto the back of a U-Haul and several more of the Shamrock plant I secured on the dashboard. I had intended on telling a witty, little story about the longgg and treacherous journey my plant underwent as it traveled past the Mason Dixon Line, through the Appalachian Mountains, and over the Monongahela River. You know...sensationalizing the 6 hour U-Haul trip that typically would have only been a 4 hour car ride.

3. Italy
I discovered a few very important things while traveling throughout Italy (which, by the way, is an incredible country in way too many ways to mention). 1- I’m pretty sure the love of my life works at a trattoria in Florence. I don’t know his name, but our eyes met and it was categorically and absolutely Love. There is certainly something to be said for ephemeral moments. 2- I am guaranteed a spot in heaven after visiting no less than 1 million churches, chapels, basilicas, and cathedrals before even stepping foot in Vatican City. 3- With the beauty of each location comes a new addition to the infamous “Lost Items List.” Note: Pittsburgh International Airport keeps their lost and found inventory for 60 days.

4. Steelers-Vikings Game/My Birthday!!!
The Pittsburgh Steelers have celebrated a few highs and suffered through several more (very low) lows throughout the 2009 NFL Season. In my opinion, the best game of the year was the Steelers-Vikings game on October 25th (and I was there!). Of course, this being my birthday, it was already a pretty fine day in and of itself, but adding a Steelers' Victory against Brett Favre (of all people!) and the Minnesota Vikings made it near the top of my 2009 moments. It wasn’t just the win (and ability to mock Brett Favre in person) that made this day ideal; Katey Clark is THE best person to attend a Pittsburgh sporting event with, the weather was impeccable, and my hangover subsided upon entry to Heinz Field. The beauty of Keyaron Fox's game winning interception even made getting pummeled (quite literally) by self-tackling and tumbling yinzers exciting. Naturally, the 70 year old men in the row in front of us may beg to differ…

It’s also interesting to note that this game raked in the highest attendance in Heinz Field history. Nice lil' tidbit for y'all! (yinz??)

5. Implosion of the Pittsburgh Steelers
The season low was most likely the Steelers’ loss to the Cleveland Browns (though we had a few to choose from). Having been raised in the Burgh, I was brought up to despise the Browns. As a result of their pitiful circumstances for the greater part of my football watching life, however, they have ironically become the ONLY team in the AFC North that I don’t hate. With this said, I have feared a loss to them on only a few very rare occasions...One of these junctures taking place on December 10, 2009, when the defending Super Bowl Champion Pittsburgh Steelers fell to the then 1 and 11 Cleveland Browns (13-6).

6. I LOVE HOCKEY

I don't think it's necessary to expand on this point. Sometimes less is more...

(For the Record: Yes, Fleury did block the shot on the right. He is a god.)


7. Life in Pittsburgh
Life in Pittsburgh is great! Basically, I hangout with friends and drink beer. From time to time, I'll hit up a museum or go for a run, but for the most part you can find me in front of a TV watching hockey, football, or really bad tv shows about vampires. Apparently... my life hasn't changed at all.

8. The Glories of Unemployment
Sleeping all day, staying up all night, ignoring your bank account balance while spending money you don't have on lavish things (booze) you don't need(yes, I need booze!). Ignorance is bliss! Sadly though, all good things must come to an end. Now I have a job and am starting grad school- sleeping all day is a thing of the past...But the whole ignoring your bank account technique is still working out quite well for me (errrr).

9. Being an Adult
I find that for the most part being a "grown-up" kind of sucks (mostly sucks), but it does have its occasional perks.... For one, you can eat ice cream for dinner any time you want, and no one can tell you otherwise. Same goes for popcorn. Also, you can do all the things that you thought you were too cool to do as a teenager...like, sled riding, dancing to Phil Collins, and eating peanut butter. Of course there are several other more obvious benefits of "legality", but these are undoubtedly amongst the best.

10. Top 10 Lists
I should never commit to doing a “Top 10 List” because I can never think of a tenth item for the list…hmmm Ah well… Thanks for reading this far!


Friday, October 2, 2009

Vado in Italia!!


Sorry to my two, maybe three readers for going m.i.a. recently. It’s been a busy week for me; finishing up work, packing, moving, pretending to unpack, looking at all my shit, thinking about unpacking, wishing I didn’t have to unpack, moving boxes around in hopes that they will eventually unpack themselves…you know the drill. It’s hard work and such a brainless and mind numbing activity that I’m not sure I will be equipped to write anything worth reading for at least a few weeks. The good news is that I leave for Italy in the morning; so hopefully, the brain cells I’ve neglected in the past week will be sufficiently reinvigorated…that is, unless the much anticipated consumption of copious amounts of wine finishes them off. Il vino mi piace! (The latter being the more likely of the two possible results.) For those of you who wish you could fit into my suitcase, or if you actually have any interest in my travels, I will be flying into Milano, continuing onto Cinque Terre (beach!!). We will then spend some time in Florence, Tuscany and the Chianti region and will finish in Roma! I foresee having many humorous antic-dotes from my travels...and hell, if I don't, I'll make some up; so expect some updates upon my return (that is if I even make it back to the States...maybe I'll just stay. I am unemployed after all...)

Now for your listening pleasure I bring you Senor Renato Carosone...

Friday, September 25, 2009

Officially Unemployed!

This will be a short (yet personally satisfying) post...I simply want to declare to the blogisphere (and to all the great people out there who listened to be bitch about my crappy job for more time than I'd like to admit) that I am now OFFICIALLY unemployed! When 5 pm rolled along, I could hardly contain my excitement, and 5:31 never looked so sweet! My coworkers, who I must say are very awesome, did give me a great send off on Wednesday; consisting of a company sponsored happy hour. Naturally, I am always very appreciative of free booze, but I have to admit that I'm fairly certain, no, entirely, 100% certain, that the moment I walked out the door was the happiest moment in my professional life! I realize that soon the bank account will run dry, and the consequences of my actions will become perfectly clear, but, at this moment, unemployment feels splendid! How will I celebrate? Ice cream for dinner and booze for dessert! Oh happy day!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Crazy Times in the News

So I'm not gonna lie....this particular posting is most definitely a procrastination technique. It's currently 11:39 PM, and tomorrow is my last day at work!! (yessssssss!!!!) As you would expect, it just wouldn't be right if my job didn't suck until the very bitter end, so I should be doing work right now. (If you can call plugging meaningless numbers into a spreadsheet that will most likely sit on a share drive and never be looked at again "work." Or maybe that is the DEFINITION of "work.") As I'm sure you've noticed, the news has been quite interesting and incraziable lately, so I am going to take a moment to share my thoughts on a few particularly fascinating happenings around the world. I feel this will undoubtedly benefit my brain significantly more than the useless data inputting I should be doing. (Yes, I made "incraziable" up- great word, right?)

1 - G20 Summit in Pittsburgh
Obviously, I have to comment on this...Being from Pittsburgh and all. I think it's pretty cool that it's taking place in my hometown and soon-to-be residing city, but I must admit it is kind of bizarre to keep hearing & seeing Pittsburgh all over the news. Also, watching the news footage has been a little unnerving. If I didn't know better, I would think it was coverage of riots in the Middle East or something. I hear most of the protests are pretty legit and peaceful. My dad actually spent last night and today handing out food to the protesters, which I think is pretty rad. It does seem, though, that there are definitely a few too many crazies out there - shattering store windows, throwing dead animals, and eating babies and stuff. (okay...maybe there hasn't been any baby eating...yet...but my point stands.) I understand why people are protesting corporations and the American banking system, but I tend to believe (more or less) that radical, destructive behavior isn't likely to help anyone's cause or help affect any kind of beneficial change. Simply put, vandalism in the City of Champions. Not cool! Where's Mean Joe Greene when you need him? Also - Throwing dead animals? Isn't this supposed to be about global economics? But at any rate, I hope all my people in the Burgh are safe and sound and aren't trapped at work or school or the Liberty Tubes or anything. And if you are, by God I pray you make it at least as far as the nearest bar. Cheers!

2 - Mackenzie Phillips had Sex with her Dad...A Lot
WHAT.THE.FUCKING.FUCK!

3 - Plaxico Burress - 2 Years for Wearing Sweat Pants to a Night Club
Seriously...2 years? Poor guy! As I'm sure you've noticed from my previous rants, I am quite the liberal, and I'm all for gun control, but I think 2 years is a little excessive. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying he should have gotten off scotch free, but I think he got hit pretty hard; especially when considering he plead guilty to a lesser charge rather than going to trial. I also find it hard to believe that he's serving more time than Michael Vick AND Donte Stallworth, who got a DUI and killed someone in the process. I'm thinking shooting himself in the leg probably sucked quite a bit, too. (Note: I didn't even mention Ray Lewis or OJ Simpson. Oops! I just did...)

4 - Glenn Beck Boils Frogs in Failed Metaphor Attempt
FOX News, you never cease to shock and horrify me. In an attempt to demonstrate a metaphor about...something stupid, Glenn Beck apparently boiled some frogs. The concept was that they were supposed to leap out of the boiling water. Now, I don't know if he ACTUALLY boiled real, living frogs, and I certainly hope he didn't, but seriously can you think of anything more ridiculous? I thiiiink this was Mr. Beck's way of inspiring his people to rise up against... ummm... fascism..orrr..communism...uhh...Health Care??? No idea... But I'm pretty sure that the frogs in the metophor represent the American People. Sooo, Glenn Beck metaphorically killed the American People?? That's just awesomely funny! OH! And apparently he slow boiled John McCain, too. What the hell? He's a war hero, damnit!

Theory: FOX News - An experiment created and maintained by the United States government to gauge how much false information can be fed to the American People before a major percentage of the population's brains shrivel to the size of raisins.

5 - (sorry! downer alert) Human Resources VP Beaten to Death in India
After laying off 42 people at an auto parts company in India, an HR VP was beaten to death by a mob. This is just sad. It reminds me of how desperate the economic situation is across the world and how good we actually still have it in the US.

Oh hell! It's 1:11 AM...I guess I should do some work. Fuck! Sooo that's all for the evening, kids. As always, I hope you found something mildly entertaining and insightful.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Why Do People Hate the Steelers?

Try asking people why they hate the Steelers. Never a good response. At least I can say I hate the Patriots because they're cheaters, and I hate the Ravens because they've killed people...hate the Steelers...why? Because they win.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Things I Will Miss About DC

2 - The Protests

I will preface by saying that I am pretty liberal, so while my intention is not to insult anyone, there is bound to be some liberal bias soon to follow. That said, feel free to stop reading here if you'd like (assuming anyone's actually reading this).



This past Saturday, in an attempt to ignore my terrible cold, I ventured into the streets of DC. Apart from my head feeling like an oversized water balloon ready to burst at any moment, it was a very lovely day. Unfortunately (for all of us), there was also one other fairly large problem. The streets were swarming with what I will refer to as Tea Partiers. This brings us to “Things I will Miss About DC” #2: The Protests.

I’m not entirely sure why I’ll miss them. They cause traffic and confusion in the city, not to mention the Metro. I very rarely encounter them and have only ever attended one by accident. Even then, I was mostly just an onlooker. Regardless, they help pull me out of the pit of apathy where I so often find myself (being a twenty something living in post-Bush America). Also, they can be pretty funny. Loooooots of characters…

As I wandered through DC on Saturday, my friend and I found ourselves knee deep in a protest on Capitol Hill and the Mall organized by the Tea Party Movement, which opposes President Obama’s Health Care Reform. [Note: I have made an honest effort to learn about the various bills in Congress, but it hasn’t been easy. I can’t imagine that with the constant misinformation and fear mongering being spread across the country it’s easy for the average American to become truly informed on this issue at all. Factcheck.org helps dispel some myths though – I have included a link. Take a look.] My intention is not to get into a health care debate, and make no mistake; I have absolutely no doubt that, while I did not see any, there must have been a few very intelligent and well informed people at this gathering. I did, however, encounter several people who can only be described as stupid. I would try to come up with a more descriptive adjective, but it would be wasted on these people. And unfortunately in this country, stupid people are very opinionated...and loud. The more I walked through the crowds, the more I realized how helpful a quick lesson from my 6th grade Social Studies teacher, Miss Blanning, would be. I will not be making any actual attempt to contact Miss Blanning, but I will take a moment to cite Mr. Webster and define for us all the below terms.

so·cial·ism
Pronunciation: \ˈsō-shə-ˌli-zəm\
1 : any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods2 a : a system of society or group living in which there is no private property b : a system or condition of society in which the means of production are owned and controlled by the state3 : a stage of society in Marxist theory transitional between capitalism and communism and distinguished by unequal distribution of goods and pay according to work done

fas·cism
Pronunciation: \ˈfa-ˌshi-zəm also ˈfa-ˌsi-\
1 often capitalized : a political philosophy, movement, or regime (as that of the Fascisti) that exalts nation and often race above the individual and that stands for a centralized autocratic government headed by a dictatorial leader, severe economic and social regimentation, and forcible suppression of opposition2 : a tendency toward or actual exercise of strong autocratic or dictatorial control


com·mu·nism
Pronunciation: \ˈkäm-yə-ˌni-zəm, -yü-\
1 a : a theory advocating elimination of private property b : a system in which goods are owned in common and are available to all as needed2 capitalized a : a doctrine based on revolutionary Marxian socialism and Marxism-Leninism that was the official ideology of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics b : a totalitarian system of government in which a single authoritarian party controls state-owned means of production c : a final stage of society in Marxist theory in which the state has withered away and economic goods are distributed equitably

Czar
Variant(s): also tsar or tzar \ˈzär, ˈ(t)sär\
1 : emperor; specifically : the ruler of Russia until the 1917 revolution 2 : one having great power or authority


My initial intention was to stop at the definitions and let everyone figure my point out on their own, but after watching the above video I got a little fired up; so I’m going to take an extra minute to give my two cents regarding this little Social Studies lesson. Unless things have changed significantly since last November, I’m pretty sure Obama was elected by a rather large majority. Sorry, if you were on the ass end of that stick, America. I know how it feels; I was there for 8 years. Also, seeing as he’s not Russian, I’m thinking it’s nearly impossible for him to actually be a Czar. (At least, I don’t thiiink he’s Russian…ask Ann Coulter. She’ll know for sure. Or Sarah Palin, since she can see Russia from her house.) In regards to the health care bills in committee, they do not eliminate the private option and do not create a fully government funded option either; so whether you agree with them or not, you really can’t call them socialist bills, can you? Don’t get me wrong, if we could, I’d totally be into it. Although, Medicare IS fully funded and administrated by the goverment, so I guess every president since Harry Truman has been a socialist. As for calling Obama a fascist…c’mon. I think Mr. President likes his private property just as much as the next person. And let’s not fool ourselves…If he were a fascist, especially when considering his majority support in Congress, I don’t think my friend’s Labradoodle would even be allowed to march on Washington without major consequences. I find it so interesting that even after the Census Bureau's report on the failure of the Bush Administration, people are still so incredibly petrified by the thought of change.


My proposal to the American People - Let's be real for a tiny second and calm the fuck down. Stop getting your information from Rush Limbaugh and Fox News; instead, try reading a book. And for christ's sake, stop calling Obama a Czar or Emperor, King…whatever. We all know there’s only one King in American and that’s Jesus.



(Oh! One last thing…lay off the Joker. He's too good for politics.)

Sunday, September 13, 2009

No Excuses, Serena!

Remember when we all found out that the Patriots are cheaters and we finally had a legit reason to hate them? Well, this is exactly how I feel about Serena Williams’ loss today at the US Open. I have never liked Serena, and I have never rooted for her. I have always found her pompous yet somehow classless at the same time. I realize it’s impossible to dispute her incredible athleticism and she’s unarguably among the best tennis players in the world. I think she’s a little schmanly, but she’s clearly in great shape and Playboy wanted her picture so someone out there must find her pretty attractive. I’ll go ahead and dive into the deep end and even say that she has a nice, cheery smile, but the general brazen attitude of the entire Williams family has always rubbed me the wrong way.

For full discloser, I have spent 21 of my nearly 26 years playing tennis and was raised by a tennis pro. This being the case, it will come to no one’s surprised that I have encountered more than my fair share of snobby and confident tennis players. While, tennis and snobbery go hand in hand, and well, confidence is a must if you intend to be among the best in any sport, Serena takes both to a new level. To better make my point, I will have to redefine the word “snobbery” in Williams’ terms, which is quite different than that defined by…saaayyy Roger Federer. Roger makes it clear you know he’s better than you. I would describe his arrogance in a more classical sense. Even his serve has an air of pretension, and his graciousness is enough to make you puke. Serena on the other hand, displays her egotism by filming reality T.V. shows, buying crappy football teams, and blaming losses on injuries and stupid mistakes. God FORBID her opponent actually outplays her!

(Note: I do not dislike Roger Federer. I just thought the comparison would help make my point. He’s the best player in tennis, and to be honest, his nauseating courteousness after a match does seem pretty genuine (even if it does result in some minor gagging). He is pretty snooty though. I mean - he's Swiss…)

On to the issue at hand…[If you didn’t see/hear/read about Serena Williams typical display of sportsmanship during her semifinals match at the US Open, here’s the short story short. Down 15-30 and 5-6 after losing the 1st set, Serena was essentially 2 points away from losing the match. At this point, she is called for a foot fault on her 2nd serve, and is now just 1 point away from losing the match. In her defense, looked like a bogus call, but in classic Serena fashion, she loses control and starts yelling at the line judge. She allegedly says, “If I could, I would take this fucking ball and shove it down your fucking throat and kill you.” Who knows what she really said, but her gestures were enough to warrant a penalty. Because she had been issued a warning after losing the first set for slamming her racquet against the ground, her second penalty resulted in a point to Clijsters, which, combined with her foot fault (bad call or not), ended the match. Williams was also later fined $10,500]

In my eyes, this behavior devalues your opponent’s win. It says “you did not win this point” “you did not win this match” “I fucked up!” “I lost it!” In other words “fuck you.” Sure, this happens in sports, we’ve all seen it, just ask a Mets fan. But the fact is, no one shows up to play Serena Williams hoping she’s going to fuck up and “let you win.” Kim Clijsters played an amazing match and deserved to win, but in the end, it’s a win with an asterisks. Is that fair? I dare say not.

To be honest, in my opinion it was inevitable that Serena was going to lose the match. She was clearly losing focus, and Clijsters was playing phenomenally. Serena knew this, consciously or not, and this is probably why she lost it on the court in the first place. Regardless, Serena has trained harder, longer and to a completely different level than I ever did growing up, and if I had ever behaved this way I would still be running laps as punishment. That said, the match wasn't actually over yet. Had she just shut her trap and served the ball, maybe she could have won... And more importantly, had she made it to the finals and won the Open she would have tied Billie Jean King’s Grand Slam title record. Does this make her even more brainless for flipping out? I think so; but needless to say, I'm happy to see Billie Jean retain her title. Especially if the alternative is sharing it with Serena.

So my words to Serena: No excuses! Next time, try losing with a little maturity and class. I do not care if you have 11 singles Grand Slam titles. I don’t really care about your Olympic gold medals. And you know what!? I don’t even care that you own the Miami Dolphins! There are NO excuses for acting like petulant child! I watch hockey for the death threats, tennis for the cute, furry, green balls.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Things I will Miss About DC

1- Steelers Games at the Pour House
Now say what you will about Steelers fans, but as bias as I am, I can't think of a better group of people to experience our recent good fortune. I realize that a lot of people don't like us (places like the Pour House don't help our reputation), and truthfully, I can't blame them. I'd like to think a lot of it is jealousy, but (as a Pittsburgher I can say this) - we're spoiled. Simply put. With two Lombardi trophies and a Stanley Cup in just three years, being named America's Most Livable City (again), and being chosen as the host of this year's G20 Summit, the only thing keeping Pittsburgh grounded nowadays are the Pittsburgh Pirates. That said, even the Pirates have a somewhat desirable history. Personally, I cannot stand to watch an entire baseball game, and honestly, I don't know many people who can, so I am perfectly content focusing on football for the Fall.

This brings me to why I will miss Steelers Games at the Pour House. As the season opener coverage began on Thursday night, it wasn't the mediocre performances by the Black Eyed Peas and TIm McGraw (that I only tolerated because football was soon to follow), it was the vision the self proclaimed City of Champions that made me so happy. As I told many throughout the night, I had almost forgotten how much I love football. That is...until I saw the fireworks over Heinz Field and my team (that I have a somewhat unhealthy obsession with) run on onto the field. I miss Pittsburgh (obviously since I am moving there in just 3 weeks) and for me, over the past 7 years, the Pour House has been as close to the Burgh as I could get; as close to home as I could get. (yes, I fully admit I am apparently painfully corny and ridiculously sentimental. If I ever claim to be otherwise I fully permit you to punch me in the face.)

Pittsburgh in DC. The scene on Pennsylvania Avenue in Capitol Hill on game day is one that could make even the biggest Pittsburgh cynic just a little bit envious. For hours leading up to the game, Steelers fans flock up and down the street to secure their spot at this otherwise very ordinary bar. Among my friends, it’s the talk of the week. The person who gets there first to commandeer space, is in a very real sense considered a hero. It truly is a little piece of my home town in what I consider to be a very impersonal and arrogant city. I half expect the theme song from Cheers to be playing when I walk in the door. Thank God it never is, but there are more god damn Steelers songs than you can even imagine, and at the Pour House they play each and every one of them throughout the night. I hear the bar isn’t even owned by Pittsburghers anymore, but you wouldn’t know it, because Pittsburgh ex-pats continue to gather there game after game, year after year. There are Steelers championship pennants and flags everywhere and the freaking stairs are even black and gold. The stairs!! I don’t particularly LOVE their pierogies, but for Christ sakes, they have pierogies on the menu. How can you NOT order them?

(Note: Naturally, this year the Cup is in attendance as well. And by "The Cup" I of course mean a replica created by my dear friends at the Pour House after Game 7 of the SCFs. Some may call it obnoxious, I call it the culmination of my life [dramatic much??])

Saving the World. On week night games, one of the best parts of the Pour House are the unknowing staffers and interns from the Hill stumbling into what I deemed earlier as a seemingly “ordinary bar.” These poor people just spent a good 10 hours, working for pennies with the simple intention to save the world (whatever that means). All they want is a god damn beer. What do they get? Borderline psychotic Steelers fanatics screaming in their faces... I may not be a Raiders fan or even an Eagles fan, so I’d like to think I’m nicer than some, but you better believe that if you walk into MY bar on game day without your Steelers gear on, EVEN if you ARE saving the world (or doing God knows what else on Capitol Hill) and even if it is YOUR bar every other day of the week, I don’t want you there. By the end of the first half, these people are by far the drunkest in the bar. Some may leave after the first few minutes of the game, but many stay, because honestly it’s like train wreck. Watching football fans in their element may cause severe intoxication, but it’s certainly something that very few can pass up.

The People. It’s not just about the crowds. Pittsburgh is a small town, and it’s great to remember that when you’re stuck in the masses of a forever transient metropolis. During the course of the game, it is inevitable that you will meet at least a half dozen new people who will soon consider you among their nearest and dearest. When you show up next week or even next year, they’ll be waiting for you; beer in hand, saving you a spot– because after all, you did just almost experience the heart break of a century together. And let’s be honest there are few things better than quickly locking arms with the stranger next to you as the Pittsburgh Polka is blasted throughout the bar after a Steelers victory. And then of course there is the “You Smell Like…Lady." You know who I’m talking about. Every sports bar has this person. The person who goes around calling the plays. They each have their perfect line, and the dance they do when they’re right. Sure, 9 out of 10 times they’re going to be wrong, but that one time they get it right makes up for the other 9 ten fold. Why? Because it makes them the Bar Oracle, the person who has a direct ear with the football gods. The Pour House, in particular, has this woman. She comes up to you and smells you. She literally fucking smells you and then says sternly and intently “You know what you smell like?” “What (crazy lady)?” “You smell like an interception!” And you know what, last night after she said that, hell yes Troy Polamalu got a fucking interception! I love this woman because she reminds me of why I love sports. She takes a chance every time; knowing sometimes (usually even) she'll be wrong, she'll lose, but she'll eventually get it right, and everyone loves her for it. She reminds me that there's something to be said for losing. Losing is what make's winning feel so incredible! And the fear of losing is what makes sports fans love every minute of every game. (Can’t lie…the 6 Lombardi Trophies don’t hurt either)

Conclusion. I will conclude by acknowledging two specific points. 1 - I am moving to Pittsburgh where I will be more than sufficiently saturated in Steelers Football; and 2- The Pour House has it’s draw backs – the bathroom floods, and you can’t get a normal sized Diet Coke to save your life - but regardless I will miss my little piece of Pittsburgh in DC. After all, why would anyone want a Diet Coke during a football game anyway???

If you made it all the way through to the end, I thank you, and I hope I didn’t bore you too terribly.

I Have a Blog!

Soooo a while back I had decided to start a blog. Yes, a blog. To tell you the truth, I don’t even read many of them, but I had initially thought about it because I am soon to be unemployed, and I figured it would be a good time killer while I plot my next move in life, as well as a great way to document the trials and tribulations of my self-inflicted unemployment. After a little more thought, I realized there are many valuable parts of my life in DC that I wouldn’t mind documenting. I’ve been here for 7 years, so there better be at least a few things worth writing about. I can get pretty long winded, and probably suck at writing, so feel free to stop reading at anytime, but regardless, I hope to entertain at least one person out there- Even if that one person is me. So here I go…

My first "series" if you will, is "Things I Will Miss About DC." I will also intermingle random other thoughts and opinions. Enjoy! (no judging, no judging :-) )